THe FReCKLeD FINGeR

Ever start your day with such an out of the ordinary, possibly tragic or even traumatic event that sets the course for the remainder of your day?

Your day is shit now.  It's ruined.  No reason to even pretend to finish it in anything resembling a positive mood.

• Maybe it's a phone call that your parents were killed at the zoo.
• Or you get in a fender bender on your way to work and you just happen to be in between insurances at the time.
• Your on-again-off-again girlfriend saw a little blue plus sign this morning.

What ever it is, it's awful.

I had one of those today.  I was doing my laundry in the basement of my apartment building when I was about to transfer my wet clothes from the washer to the dryer and saw another load in the dryer. 

Predicament.

I'm usually against touching other tenant's clothes as I would never want anyone to touch my own... so what should I do?  I decided, in the interest of time, to take the completed laundry out.  This was my shitty experience that would, in turn, make the rest of my day shitty.

I tried to gently touch grab the load with as little pressure as I could but when I pulled out the load, my hand was firmly on the inside of what I thought was a parachute.  To my incredible and undeniable dismay, it was a pair of woman's underwear.  Fuck me.

Of course it couldn't possibly be a hot, tightly packaged girl's underwear.  No, that would have been fine with me.  I had to pull out this piece of fabric that could warm six Somali children.

I would just like to personally thank my real estate agent for filling me in on the little tidbit that I would, just by happen stance, be sharing a building, and unfortunately a washing facility, with the often elusive, cat eating, undergarment wearing 'Manhattan Manatee'. 

I'm still shook up.